The best first dates after 50 are short, daytime and somewhere you can talk: a walk along a seafront or a pier, a wander round a cathedral city, a market morning or a pub lunch. In the South West that means places like Plymouth Hoe, Exeter Quay, Clifton, Bath's Royal Crescent, Wells or Weymouth seafront. Keep the first meeting public and give yourselves an easy way to end it.
What makes a good first date when you are over 50?
Not much has changed in what makes a first date work, but most of us have stopped pretending to enjoy what does not. Loud bars and late dinners are out. What helps is somewhere you can hear each other, a natural length of an hour or two, parking or a bus stop nearby, and a café or a bench for when you want to sit down. A first date is only a chance to see whether you would like a second. Keep it modest and you take the pressure off both of you.
Is a walk a good first date?
Very often it is the best one. Walking side by side is easier than sitting face to face, silences feel natural, and there is always something to look at. Choose a flat, busy, well-used path rather than a remote one, and agree the length in advance.
- Devon: along Exeter Quay and the canal path, or round Plymouth Hoe with the Sound in front of you.
- Cornwall: the waterfront at Falmouth, or the level stretch of the Camel Trail out of Wadebridge.
- Somerset: the seafront and the pier at Clevedon, a graceful Victorian pier on the Severn estuary.
- Dorset: Weymouth's long seafront, or the Cobb at Lyme Regis with the Jurassic Coast either side.
- Bristol: the Downs and the walk to the Clifton Suspension Bridge, with the gorge below.
Where can you go if you would rather sit and talk?
A pub lunch remains a favourite for a reason. It has a natural start and finish, it is busy in the middle of the day, and a country pub in a village between your two homes means neither of you does all the driving. Pick somewhere you have been before, if you can, so at least one of you knows the parking and the menu.
Coffee and a slice of cake in a market town works well too. Ask for a table by the window, and you will never be short of something to talk about.
First date ideas with a bit more to them
A cathedral city
Exeter, Wells and Truro each have a cathedral at their heart and a close or green around it that is lovely to wander. Wells, small enough to cross on foot, is particularly good for a gentle first meeting, with the cathedral, the market place and the moat round the Bishop's Palace all within a few minutes' walk. In Bath, the Abbey, Pulteney Bridge and the Royal Crescent make a circuit that suits a morning.
A market morning
Most South West market towns have a market day, and wandering the stalls gives you an easy start: you can chat about what you see, buy a few things and stop for coffee when you feel like it. Find out which day your town's market runs before you suggest it.
A heritage railway ride
Devon and Somerset both have heritage steam railways, and a ride along a valley or the coast is a gently romantic second or third date. For a first meeting, keep it to a short return trip so neither of you is committed to a whole day.
A museum or a gallery
Exeter, Bristol, Plymouth and Truro all have city museums, and a gallery gives you something to share opinions about from the first minute. Many let you wander in without a ticket, which keeps the question of who pays nicely simple.
A garden in bloom
The South West is famous for its gardens, especially in Cornwall in spring. A public garden or a park in full flower, with a tea room near the gate, makes an afternoon that is easy to enjoy and easy to end.
How do you stay safe on a first date?
A few habits make first meetings relaxed rather than nerve-racking:
- Meet in daylight in a busy public place, and get there under your own steam.
- Let a friend or relative know your plans: where, who with, and roughly what time you will be back.
- Keep chatting on the site until you have met, and keep your home address to yourself for now.
- Never lend or send money, whatever the story.
- If something does not feel right, leave. A polite excuse is all you owe anyone.
Our safety page covers how verification, reporting and blocking work on the site.
Who pays on a first date after 50?
Most people now offer to split the bill, and many quietly appreciate it when the other person insists on paying for the coffee. Whoever suggested the date might offer to pay, the other might offer to get the next one. That small promise of a next time is a very good sign.
Find someone to take on a first date
Ideas only help once you have someone to meet. Our members live right across the region, and the local pages suggest more places close to home: see Devon, Cornwall, Somerset, Dorset, Bristol and Bath, or the full list on locations. If you prefer meeting in a group first, read about singles events for over 50s. More guides are on the articles page.
First date questions
What is a good first date for over 50s?
Something short, daytime and public where you can talk: a seafront or riverside walk, coffee in a market town or a pub lunch.
How long should a first date last?
An hour or two is plenty. Leaving while it is going well makes a second date easier to arrange.
Where is a good halfway place to meet?
A market town or village pub between your two homes, so neither of you has the long drive. Search by distance to keep matches within easy reach.
Should I meet at my home or theirs?
Not for a first date. Meet somewhere public and get there and back on your own.
Someone nearby would love that walk too
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